legal nurse consultants

Today we’re docked in Charlotte Amalie on St. Thomas. I’m in search of real pirates under the guise of checking out the local architecture. All that research I did on pirates for my opening speech got into my head and now I’m seeing them everywhere.

I’m sure I’ll be seeing CLNC^® consultants all over St. Thomas today. I can already tell which ones are feeling the technology deprivation. They’re the ones who at dinner last night were reminding everyone to make sure their cell phones are charged for today. More than a few Certified Legal Nurse Consultants were bugging the ship’s purser about the locations of Internet cafes so they could get caught up on email and Facebook. Speaking of Facebook, I’ll try to post some photos from the first couple of days of the Cruise and will post the rest after we get back next week. That is if I don’t take a nap!

Courtesy of Tom, here are a couple of interesting historical notes: a number of the streets here in Charlotte Amalie are made from bricks that were brought from Denmark as ballast in the holds of the merchant ships. They made a one-way trip and someone finally figured out what to do with them. The town itself has a natural deep-water port which made it very popular with merchants, pirates and today cruise ships. My biggest surprise – Camille Pissarro, one of the fathers of French Impressionism, was born here.

After the tour and history lesson I’m thinking of going back and spending the day in the ship’s spa! I’ll have to check with the local authorities before we sail to see if any CLNC^® consultants need me to help them make bail or carry their duty-free purchases onboard.

Tonight all that’s on is the NACLNC^® Networking Dinner so I might find time to lay low and spend time with my opening speech. Arrgghh!

More tomorrow!

I’m co-opting Tom’s Tuesday Tech Tip time for a report from the NACLNC^® Cruise. He’s having so much fun that he probably won’t remember to post until next Tuesday anyway, so I hope you’ll forgive him.

Yesterday was the CLNC^® Beach Olympics and so far there are only a few walking wounded limping around the ship. Apparently a few attendees found the more private parts of Coco Cay and gave new meaning to the phrase “lobster buns.” They’re easy to spot because of the way they sat (or not) at dinner. LOL!

Last night was formal night and Tom did manage to squeeze into his blue-ruffled tuxedo and all of the CLNC^® consultants looked quite elegant in their formal wear. Some of us headed up to the casino after dinner to try our luck at the games of chance (before the romance). With the tuxedos and formals it was all very James Bondish and, if you squinted your eyes, felt almost like Monte Carlo. We didn’t clean out the casino but we still have a few more nights ahead of us.

Today is our first full day of sailing and we have a busy day, not just for the CLNC^® consultants, friends and family who are onboard but for me and my staff too! It may be all fun and games for the Certified Legal Nurse Consultants, but for the rest of us there’s a lot of work! My staff, production crew and I will be up and working before many of the CLNC^® consultants come back to their cabins after a late night in the ship’s casino and clubs.

I guess this is your payback for my making you all study so hard for your CLNC^® examination while we’re out with the CLNC^® faculty drinking wine and having fun at night.

If you can’t find me, I’m in technical rehearsals for my opening speech. Last night I was having so much fun I forgot about having to deliver that speech on Friday. Arrrrgh! Plus Tom has his Tomentary™ which is guaranteed to make you laugh. I think Tom secretly wants to be a standup comedian (he at least cracks himself up). At rehearsal we’ll also be working on my “Cirque du Soleil-inspired” trapeze act.

Today we have NACLNC^® poolside networking so look for the pirate flags and pennants marking our CLNC^® section on the pool deck where Certified Legal Nurse Consultants and guests will enjoy the sun, pool, Caribbean breeze, tropical drinks (with umbrellas) and networking with each other. Let’s hope the ship rolls out a 55-gallon drum of SPF-9000 sunscreen. Then, just when we’ve played our umpteenth game of “Marco Polo” we’ll call it quits and head out of the tropical sun and into the air-conditioned ice rink for a special matinee Ice Skating Performance by the Freedom’s professional ice performers. Last year on the site visit I got to drive the Zamboni^® and throw my first and only Caribbean snowball at Tom (Ha!). I’m still amazed they can have an ice rink on a cruise ship. Too bad I forgot my hockey stick or I’d show Tom and the CLNC^® consultants how a girl from New Orleans knows her way around the pond.

After the ice show I’m hoping there will be time to head up to the top deck to see how many Certified Legal Nurse Consultants are on the rock-climbing wall. Then it’s over to the FlowRider^®. Tom’s been bugging me about trying out the boogie boards so I may just give one a spin.

More tomorrow!

One of my favorite things about cruising is having a glass of champagne as the ship sails. Yesterday we all did just that. The simple ceremony of sailing is such a fine tradition.

I am having so much fun already with everyone and this is only Day 2. Today we’re in the Bahamas at Coco Cay, Royal Caribbean’s private island paradise. Tom and several of my staff were here last year when we “test-cruised” the ship so we already know the best spots for a private walk on the beach and some skinny-dipping. For everyone else, there’s great beaches, plenty of lounge chairs and all sorts of activities like swimming, snorkeling, kayaking, parasailing and WaveRunners^® for the Certified Legal Nurse Consultants who feel the need for speed!

At 10:00am, we have the CLNC^® Beach Olympics. Look for the pirate flags and pennants marking our NACLNC^® area. Afterwards, for the survivors, non-participants and witnesses, we’ll have lunch al fresco on the beach and then it’s time for another of my favorite activities – resting in a shady hammock. I’ve already got mine picked out! I hope Tom remembers to come find me before the ship sails because tonight’s formal night and the Captain’s Reception, plus I want to see if he can still fit into his wedding tuxedo!

Today’s the first day of the NACLNC^® Conference Cruise aboard the Freedom of the Seas. It’s also Registration Day and I am excited to see all my CLNC^® friends again. It’s always fun to meet your families and friends – through them I learn even more about you.

Vince has been living onboard the Freedom for a week already, as a passenger, not a stowaway. He’s been unpacking equipment and blowing up the hundreds of pirate beach balls we got for all of you. Be sure to thank Vince when you get yours. When he asked if he could just blow up a few dozen and put the rest in the Conference tote bags, I assured him he has enough hot air for the job. I might be his twin, but I don’t think he’d appreciate me telling you about this so please don’t repeat what I said when you see him onboard. LOL! Maybe next time we’ll get bigger beach balls!

After registration, we’ll all be exploring the ship. We’re scheduled to set sail around 5pm (remember to bring champagne up on deck) and then for a whole week it’ll be CLNC^® pirates at sea! Tonight is our first networking dinner and we’ve got a special seating area for Certified Legal Nurse Consultants and cabin-mates only. Instead of sitting at the same table every night, we worked a deal with the ship to allow everyone to table-hop from night to night to maximize the networking opportunities. I hope the Captain’s ready for us!

More tomorrow!

Vickie

Today’s blog is the equivalent of a Certified Legal Nurse Consulting quickie. In between preparing documents and PowerPoint^® slides for the NACLNC^® Conference Cruise I’m packing and trying to figure out how to stuff all my stuff into one rolling suitcase (or not). So, rather than drone on and on, here is one quick Microsoft^® Office^® tip I learned this week.

All CLNC^® consultants know that UPPER CASE TYPING IN AN EMAIL IS THE EQUIVALENT OF SHOUTING but sometimes I also have to correct it on NACLNC^® Conference PowerPoint^® slides, where apparently PEOPLE FEEL THE NEED TO SHOUT. To remedy this, I need to change that upper case text to sentence case.

I used to highlight the text with my mouse and then select the “Change Case” button on Word’s “Font” bar but that’s so old school, and there’s a faster way. I assume you know that left clicking twice on a word will select that word and left-clicking three times on a word will select a sentence (or paragraph). So rapidly select or highlight the text you need to convert and then hold down your <Shift> key and hit <F3>. The first time you do this it will change upper case into all lower case, do it again and it’ll put everything into title case (sometimes) and one more time will go back to upper case. This works in Word, PowerPoint and is especially powerful in Outlook because you can quickly change that SHOUTING email into a normal, friendly communication.

That’s it for this week my CLNC^® amigos. Next week I’m graciously donating my Tuesday Tech Tip slot to Vickie who’s going to blog live from the NACLNC^® Conference Cruise. I’ll see you on the 22nd!

Keep on techin’,

Tom

Attention Certified Legal Nurse Consultants: we’re down to the most important part of the 2011 NACLNC^® Eastern Caribbean Conference Cruise information and that’s the Conference itself. Click here for the Conference Cruise itinerary of all our special NACLNC^® Networking Events. Then continue reading for some special announcements that will ensure your NACLNC^® Conference goes smoothly:

1. Grab Your Booty. Once you board the ship on Sunday, March 13th, there will be MANDATORY Conference Registration in the Conference Center on Deck 2 from 1:30-4:00pm. Register early so that you can be on deck when the ship sails at 4:00pm. Come by and pick up your tote bag, Conference packet and your special CLNC^® Consultants of the Caribbean pirate booty (required for entry into the networking events). Spin the Wheel of Fortune or just say “Ahoy Matey!”
2. Pack Fast and Light (textbook-wise). You have already received your link to the 2011 NACLNC^® Conference Textbook – be sure to download, print and pack the texts for any session you plan to attend so that you’ll have them for the sessions.
• The ship does have a business center, but its hours are erratic and the cost of printing your textbook on board will be prohibitive so be proactive and print it before you leave home.
• After you return home, you’ll receive a link to streaming audio versions of all the 2011 NACLNC^® Conference sessions so you won’t miss any of the action. I’d recommend only printing and bringing the sessions you plan to attend while you’re on board. Remember seating is first come, first served and space is limited!
3. Dine with Your CLNC^® Pirate Compadres. We’ve done away with assigned seats at dinners and have instead arranged a dedicated seating area for all CLNC^® pirates in the main dining room at the late (8:30pm) dinner seating each evening. Join us to put the sea in CLNC^® networking and try and sit with different colleagues every night to make the most out of this unique opportunity.
4. Come Enjoy a Tankard of Grog with the Other CLNC^® Pirates and Me. There will be a Private NACLNC^® Welcome Reception for all NACLNC^® attendees, their guests and cabin-mates. You won’t want to miss this (plus it’s right before dinner on Tuesday, March 15th). Be sure to find your way to Studio B at 7:15pm Tuesday or you’ll be saying “Arrgggghh” because you missed the fun!
5. Don’t Miss a Moment of Momentous Networking and Fun. Click here to read about all our special CLNC^® Networking Events, like the Beach Olympics, Poolside Networking and of course, our Farewell Reception. Remember your family, cruise-mates and cabin-mates are invited to all networking events!
6. Start Your Day with an Eye-Opener. Our Opening Session is in the Arcadia Theatre at 9:00am Friday, March 18th. This year your family, cabin-mates and fellow travelers are all invited to the opening session! Concurrent sessions are for registered CLNC^® consultants only and will be in the Conference Center on Deck 2 beginning at 10:30am. There will be coffee available outside the Conference Center in case you were out late.
7. Get Yourself the Business (Cards that is). Finally, plan on bringing lots of business cards, a sweater (yes it does get cold at sea), pens and plenty of highlighters and be ready to have fun and network!

I can’t wait to see you at Registration on Sunday, March 13th. Bring your family or travel companions by to say hello! This is going to be the best NACLNC^® Conference ever!

Success Is On Board!

Many CLNC^® consultants have opted to buy laser printers for their home offices and legal nurse consulting businesses. I’m a big fan of laser printers – they’re usually faster than inkjet printers and are inexpensive and affordable. If you buy an all-in-one, you can combine it with a scanner and fax machine (Yes Virginia, some people still use faxes). Your attorney-clients will prefer to receive your legal nurse consulting reports on laser-printed paper because they can highlight the important deviations from the standards of care without the fear of the smear.

One of the disadvantages of laser printers that Certified Legal Nurse Consultants are sure to discover is that laser printers, or their cartridges, will eventually leak toner. One way to avoid or minimize the chance of toner spills is to use only new, brand-name cartridges rather than refilled cartridges. Spills will still happen, though. Usually the leaked toner just stays inside the printer, gathering in the low areas, and will remain there until you move or otherwise disturb that printer.

Sometimes, when changing your laser printer’s toner cartridge, you’ll spill toner either in the machine, all over yourself or worse on your carpet. It can happen if you have a bad or broken cartridge, use way too much force or simply bungle the job. (Note to self: never hold cartridge over head and shake.)

When the dreaded leak does occur, you’ll end up with toner on you, your desk, printer table and probably the floor. The natural reaction is to run and get the vacuum cleaner and try to vacuum it up – DON’T DO IT. A typical household vacuum isn’t designed to capture particles as small as toner and, although it will suck the toner in the front just like it should, there’s a really good chance it will blow it right out the vent in the back thus spreading the toner around your home and office and onto people who won’t be happy about it.

So, how do my CLNC^® amigos clean a toner spill? If it’s on a hard surface (Yee-haw, you’re home free!) like a desktop, simply sweep it into a plastic garbage bag or other receptacle using a dry cloth or piece of heavy paper. While you’re doing that, be very careful not to spill it onto your floor or carpet. Don’t use a wet cloth, it might cause smearing or dissolve the toner onto the surface you’re trying to protect.

If it’s on your carpet, first sweep up what you can using the method above (hard paper onto a dust pan) but very, very carefully. Then get on the phone to your favorite carpet cleaning company and be brutally honest. Tell them you’ve spilled laser printer toner and need them to come immediately with a toner vacuum. Don’t step in it, spread it around or sweep it with a whisk broom. Also, keep it off your fingers and clothing and finally, don’t attempt anything involving liquid. Remove small children, pets and spouses with power tools (e.g. lawn blowers or shop vacs) from the immediate area and keep them out until the professional carpet cleaner has done their job.

Toner spills will happen; they’re inevitable. Cleaning them up correctly is optional.

Keep on techin’,

Tom

The 2011 NACLNC^® Eastern Caribbean Conference Cruise will be here before we know it. Whether you’re a veteran cruiser or a first-timer, I want all Certified Legal Nurse Consultants to have a good time and smooth sailing. Please pay special attention to these important instructions.

1. Make Sure You Have Your Passport to Fun! You and everyone in your party will need a current and valid passport not only to board the ship but to get back into the United States when we return. Conversely, if you meet an attorney in St. Thomas, you can jump ship, stay for a meeting, then fly back to the States later. Don’t worry if you don’t look like your photo now – you will by the end of the cruise and La Migra will let you back into the country anyway.
2. If You Want to Take Your Children and Bring Them Back, Make Sure They’re Papered. If you’re bringing a minor child and their last name differs from yours, you’ll need family legal documents allowing you to take the child out of the country, including a passport and possibly a notarized or certified copy of the child’s birth certificate. THIS IS IMPORTANT: You don’t want to find out that you have to leave your child unattended at the port for the week, or can’t bring him back into the country afterwards.
3. Here’s a Tip – Pay Your Tips in Advance. Your gratuities can be prepaid, and I’m sure you’ll want to because of the great service. There are recommended gratuities for the dining room waiter, assistant waiter and head waiter for bringing you plate after plate of delicious food. Then there’s your stateroom attendant who cleaned up after you all week. You can prepay in advance or just wait until the last night of the cruise to add the tips to your final bill.
4. Here’s Another Tip – All Drinks Have Tips Added In. Speaking of tipping, anytime you buy a drink for me or one of your CLNC^® colleagues, the ship will conveniently add a 15% gratuity. Plan ahead if you’re on a budget.
5. Leave Your Cash at Home Where It’s Safe. Cash is not accepted onboard. Instead, you’ll use your SeaPass^® card which functions as your ID, instant credit and cabin key.
6. Know Who You Are Before You Leave. The name on your cruise reservation must match the name on your passport or legal documentation. If it doesn’t, contact University at Sea^® at 800.422.0711 and fix it today.
7. Don’t Take a Pass on the Sodas or Wine. Buy your wine package ahead of time by calling 800.398.9819. This will keep you from having to wait in line once you’re onboard and you can spend your time doing more valuable things like tanning. If you want a fountain soda package, you’ll need to purchase it onboard, so if you don’t want to wait in line this would be a good time to quit your Coke^® habit.
8. Check-In Early to Save Time. Once all of the above is done, check in online at Royal Caribbean’s website using the “Before You Board” page just like you would an airline. If you haven’t done this yet, you can do it today and it will save time when you arrive at Port Canaveral. You do have to complete this no less than three days before sailing.
9. Don’t Miss the Boat. Be sure to get to the ship on time. It’s a lot easier to catch before it leaves the dock. I’m not kidding about this. If you need to, fly in the night before. You want to be sure you’re onboard when your ship sails! Consider trip insurance if you’re coming from a delay-prone airport. Also, Saturday, March 12th, Daylight Savings Time begins. Set your clocks forward one hour and make sure to set an alarm clock (you can’t rely on the hotel’s wake-up calls).
10. Travel Fast and Light. Carry a small bag onboard (meds, change of smart casual clothes and bathing suit) so you can start having fun the moment you get onboard and before your suitcase gets delivered to your room.
11. You Can Dress Them Up – But You Still Have to Take Them Out. We’d all like to see our man looking like James Bond in his tuxedo but to be honest, March of the Penguins was so last year. Formal nights aren’t as formal as they used to be. Men can get away with suits and ties and ladies can opt for cocktail dresses instead of formals. Or you can opt to go all the way. After all, when was the last time you got to do that?
12. You Can Blow Dry Your Hair But Not Iron It. When you’re dressing for formal night, keep in mind that that the ship will provide a hairdryer (low temperature) in your cabin but not an iron. Just hang the item in a steamy (but empty) shower for a few minutes.
13. Forget About the Dirty Laundry. You can have laundry done on the ship or you can just pack enough clean clothes so that you won’t need to do laundry. They can also press your clothes for a fee.
14. Disconnect – You Deserve It. Bring your cell phone, but don’t use it once we leave Port Canaveral. You may get a signal offshore but it will be at international roaming rates. Check with your cellular carrier for exceptions. For example, St. Thomas is billed by AT&T at regular U.S. rates, but if you use your AT&T phone while on the ship, even for email, you’ll be subject to maritime roaming costs (trust me it’s expensive!).
15. Really Disconnect – Email Can Wait Until You Get Home. You’ll have to buy your Internet access from the ship or else hit an Internet café while you’re in port. Better yet, rather than spending your port days checking email, let everyone know in advance that you’ll be on a week-long class-cation. They’ll understand. Give them and your family the ship’s emergency number of 888.724.7447 just in case a real emergency occurs.
16. Limit Your Duty-Free Purchases. Speaking of ports, cruise lines are pretty smart and won’t let you bring any alcohol onboard. If you buy duty-free alcohol while in a port, the ship will hold it and deliver it to you when you disembark. Then you’ll need to pack it in your luggage for the flight home. Better yet, don’t buy any – the extra couple of dollars you save won’t offset the dry-cleaning cost if a bottle breaks in your packed bags. Save your duty-free purchases for important things like jewelry and cheap souvenirs.
17. Give Yourself Some Credit. While you’re in port, they’ll be happy to take dollars, pennies, pounds or pesos. Major credit cards are also accepted with Visa and MasterCard a little more widely than American Express (but don’t leave home without it anyway).
18. Pack It So You Can Stuff It. Soft-sided or duffel-type luggage will fit in places hard luggage won’t. You’ll also need a small bag (same one you boarded with) for the last night of the cruise. On the last night, you must put your luggage outside leaving you with only a carry-off or small rolling bag for your essentials.

Success Is Onboard!

Today is such an exciting day! I received four copies of the Korean translation of my book Inside Every Woman: Using the 10 Strengths You Didn’t Know You Had to Get the Career and Life You Want Now. The cover is so different from any of the other translations of the book and seeing a new cover is one of the most fun things about the foreign translations.

This means that over 24,000,000 women (not just legal nurse consultants) in South Korea alone can access the power of Inside Every Woman. The South and North share a common language and an unheard-of literacy rate in excess of 96%. If my book makes it across the 38^th Parallel, 11,000,000 North Korean women could read it and maybe shake things up some!

Here’s the new Korean cover along with the Chinese, Polish (first and second editions), Vietnamese, Indonesian and American covers. Comment and tell me which is your favorite.

	Korean
Chinese	Polish, 1st Edition	Polish, 2nd Edition
Vietnamese	Indonesian	English/American

Success Is Inside!

In my last Tuesday Tech Tip I helped Certified Legal Nurse Consultants eliminate annoying pop-up messages that show up above your Windows^® System Tray whenever you send a print job, when your computer discovers a wireless network or if your computer simply gets chatty. This week we tackle another of my pet peeves – Windows Error Reporting. I’m certain that everyone out there who is not on a Mac^® has enjoyed the experience of having a window pop up in the middle of your work notifying you that some cryptic service or program has failed and asks you if you want to report it to Microsoft^®.

I’m totally for quality assurance but in all the years I’ve been sending these errors to Microsoft I’ve never gotten a thank you note from Bill Gates. Instead I have to click the “Send” button and then wait while Windows reports the error, then close the Error Reporting window and get back to work. All CLNC^® consultants know time equals money and you cannot bill your attorney-clients (or Microsoft) for all those lost hours clicking away and reporting Windows XP errors.

Today we put an end to the madness! Right click on your My Computer icon on your Windows Desktop and select Properties. When the “System Properties” box opens select the tab marked Advanced. Then click on the Error Reporting button. Next you can either totally disable error reporting by making that selection on the Error Reporting box or enable error reporting for just Windows or other programs by making the appropriate choices. I don’t want anyone except my CLNC^® amigos knowing what programs I’m using so I could either enable error reporting and tell it which programs to report or just turn it off altogether.

My recommendation – select “Disable error reporting” but let Windows notify you when critical errors occur (you’ll know anyway because everything will crash and stop working). Click on all the “OK” buttons to close out and you’ll now stop reporting errors (I don’t think Bill reads those reports anyway). If you’re a legal nurse consultant running Windows 7, I’d leave error reporting enabled to give Microsoft some feedback and help improve that new product.

Keep on techin’,

Tom